What Would Kettle Do?

CHU-HI!!!….We are officially a Cult!

Juliet got hers today.

Te-Kyu-Knyu-Kon is how you pronounce the tattoo on my arm. It is translated literally to “Iron Ball Into Soul” but it reads “Put your soul into the iron ball”. Nazo wrote it. She came up with it shortly after we founded the OKC in 2007.

We had just finished teaching an OKC workshop in Hofu-City Japan when the guys gave us both a gift. The gifts were two hand made teakettles. They both came in boxes with our kanji written on the top. We were all a little shiny (well, not Nazo) and I was sitting next to my friend Matt Brocklebank when he asked me where he had seen that kanji before.

“Is that your tattoo?”

“No” I said and then it hit me. I looked at the box and in that moment it seemed right. This was my life now. These people, these words, this is my life and it is everything to me.

Nazo saw that look in my eye and she knew it was going to happen. My brother Gori looked at me and took my hand and said if I get it…he would get it in the new year.

Gori is a real man, a real fucking man.

Nazo took me to a tattoo parlor just outside Tokyo, next to a sweet potato truck, down a dark ally. The door was small, chest high to me, there was a lightbulb swinging side to side. We knocked, it creaked…down the rabbit hole we went.

It was a short room with a quiet man and a small neon skull and crossbones sign on the wall humming the ventures

He would take a few short breaks to smoke a cigarette.

Kneeling on the floor can be exhausting.

I love this tattoo. It is my whole life in a sentence I don’t have the skill to write.

Nazo gave it to me,

with a little blood to seal the gift.

Now it is Juliet’s too.

I feel so emotional.

I never thought anyone would ever want anything like this.

Except for me, but I’m really weird.

I am proud and honored and scared and touched and a little lost. It just looks so beautiful on you Juliet.

You were right today, what you said in the truck about the people. About it being about the people, making this thing a little different.

You make it different. You are part of its soul.

鉄球入魂

You put your soul into the iron ball.

And it put its soul into you,

with a little blood.

Kettle,

This is just what I needed. I flew in super late last night because of crazy delays and layovers and as I am sitting here taking my first sip of coffee those words occurred to me. This sip, this past weekend…just what I needed.

Canadian Rackon

I know I have been gone for a bit. Make no mistake about it, when I am not writing I have lost my way. When I am on, really on, I look forward to writing like nothing else in this world. I know that I train harder so that I can write about how it makes me feel. I like to write about how the kettle changes me. Lately though it just hasn’t been there.

I feel like I have just been working out. I have not been missing many training days (although I have been suffering from a mild case of the tomorrows) but the extra work, the running and gpp has been slipping. Before Siberia I would train like there was no tomorrow. Now, there is defiantly a tomorrow…maybe even a day after that.

I have not been able to flip the switch. I needed a jumpstart. I needed a lick of the lightning. I got it in Toronto.

Greg Carver had Jason and I out to his awesome gym StrengthBox in Toronto this past weekend. Our good friends Boris Terzic and Eric St-Onge put the whole thing together with him and it was a great weekend.

BOOM!!!

They had a great crew of people. Some of them had lots of experience (Eric holds the Jerk Record in North America) and some were complete beginners but all were Masters of enthusiasm. The whole weekend was filled with laughs and sweat and very little (actually I think zero) blood.

StrengthBox is a super cool gym with more toys than you can imagine. It is such a good spot that Steve Maxwell stopped by to train Joe Rogan on Friday before the big UFC event this past weekend. Steve was nice enough to stop by again on Sunday to say hello to us and take a few pics!

Horosho!

Also, we had a run in By the Kettlebell Outlaw himself Ken Whetham and his beautiful wife Shari! We took a little break to fool around with some feats of awesome and fantastic revelry!! Ken is throwing the most awesome event this upcoming weekendin Michigan and if you are anywhere near it please don’t miss it! He was telling me about it (sorry guys I mean abooot it) and it sounds like an AC/DC concert with more steel. I wish I could go, I really really do!

Most of us went out to see the UFC fight on Sat. It was a great time and just one Nazo short of perfection. No, she is still not back from Tokyo. She was really trying to make it back to this one. I have never heard her sadder about missing a workshop than this. It has been so long and it is really wearing on both of us. We all missed her so much we put her in the group photo anyway…thanks KettleStell!!!

I really can’t say enough about Greg, Boris, Eric and the people we met this weekend. It was a great time and so badly needed.

On Monday Jason and I had about 40 min to catch up on the two workouts we missed over the weekend. These two were both hard for me and to do them in less than an hour was probably not going to happen. It didn’t happen. I did not hit my numbers for either set. I was exhausted from the weekend and rushing through the biggies never really works anyway.

I was standing with my forehead against the wall. It was so frustrating. I just can’t flip the switch. I can’t get my head straight.

I was on the flight home. I was getting sore and thinking about how I am failing when it hit me. These numbers, shitty as they were, are better than the best numbers I had done prior to this year. I would have been bouncing off the walls happy in December. I am better now and I am holding myself to a higher standard. I feel like my effort sucks. I feel like my training is just working out and that I am failing.  Both are true, I can do better, but all hope is not lost.

Maybe it was the special Canadian bricks they use to build the StrengthBox. Maybe it was the energy of the folks in the class, maybe it is because they pronounce the letter “Z” as “Zed”, I don’t know. Whatever it was though I am happy for it because the switch is flipped. You guys inspired the hell out of me and I want to say thank you! I owe you.

Koala Hug

It is just what I needed.

Kettle,

The weirdest thing happened yesterday. Lately I have been getting emails asking about training or workshops and after one reply they would drop off the face of the earth. I couldn’t understand it but since I am “Way too cool” to pester anyone about these things I just let them go. I was a little worried about it so I ran a few tests with my awesome web guy and everything tested ok. Yesterday I got an email from a new friend Danny Evans and he said that I should check my spam folder for his response. Apparently he did not hear back from me…apparently.

I checked my Spam Box and HOLYSHIT it was like a treasure chest! Well, kind of, since most of these emails are too old to be salvaged. I had never even thought to look. It just never occurred to me.

In the box there were several emails from prospective clients that I never heard back from. One dude who had a whole group of people who wanted to go to the last workshop and maybe 2 dozen responses to an ad for a Jeep I am selling.

I have been replying to these emails since yesterday and I am happy to say a few people have forgiven me. I am sure most of them think I am a flake. I am completely embarrassed but thankful to Danny for telling to check my spam.

So, if you have sent me an email that I have not replied to I apologize. More than likely it just got erased in the spam box. The oldest email in there was just a few weeks old.

I wanted to write this to pass along this tip to those of us who sit in the back of the classroom.

Unreal.

Kettle,

No Kettlebell chatter from me today…

I went to see a movie yesterday. I’m a huge Ray Stevenson fan. Ever since he was in the HBO series Rome  I have been watching his stuff. So when I saw that he was going to star as Danny Greene I was pumped. Not that I knew who Danny Greene was (I didn’t) and not that I had waited long for this movie (I only heard about  it last week) but I was psyched anyway.

It did not dissapoint!

There is nothing like a good gangster movie about a tough as nails protagonist taking it to the fat, stupid, lazy, and inept overlords. Danny is just a guy, but he is tougher and craftier than these “Maggots”. It really gets my blood up.

“IS THAT ALL YA GOT?! IT’S GONNA TAKE MORE THAN A FEW FIRECRACKERS TO KILL DANNY GREENE!!!”

Oh yes it will

“We’ve shot him, we’ve blowed him up…he just won’t die!”

He just keeps coming back. He learns who he can trust. He can feel who is going to betray him. He can smell the greedy, the careless, and the weak of soul.

“My enemies will be taken care of…I promise”

I love it.

Go see it.

He’s not a hard man to find.

kettle,

We had a great 2 Day Workshop in Costa Mesa at Innovative Results this past weekend! There was a good (and good looking) crowd of lifters there. Plus, we had Sarah Lightfoot, Juliet Lederle, and Mike Salemi fly in to offer some assistance making it a pretty full crew. The only one we were missing was Nazo…and boy were we missing her.

On the second day when we were handing out the certificates Aaron asked if we could take a few moments of silence for Nazo, her family, and the Japanese people. It was very touching and I wanted to take a moment to say thank you Aaron. It was a very cool and somber moment. I could really feel that you meant it. I think that is a very rare thing.

Everyone was on point all weekend. It was a great environment with lots of people who knew and liked each other. There was also a great feeling of inclusion that seems to be a hallmark of this community. It makes me really happy to be a part of this whole thing.

A apologize for not writing a whole ton. Nazo is still in Japan and my heart is heavy. It is difficult to get all up about anything right now. I am trying but when she is over there suffering with quadruple stacked tragedy it really slows me down.

I did manage to get in a good set of snatches after the workshop on Saturday. It is always nice to get that in and not miss a day of training. I am feeling stronger lately. My endurance is up. I can’t remember a time when I could teach all day and then do a close to max (including time and pace) set right after.

I am really getting to my breaking point with this Nazo situation. We are trying to plan a charity event which will probably be on April 23 in Berkeley. I have to hold off because I really want Nazo to be there but I have no idea if she will be back by then.

Nazo Unleashed!!!

I hope so.

This whole weekend Dolby and I were trying to explain to people how great the vibe is with Nazo there. It was a great workshop but we can’t explain how much better it is with her there. We were even talking about who would be Nazo’s favorite person there (It would be Armon for sure).

Thank you so much Aaron, Corey, and Geof. You and your crew are so Awesome! We can’t wait to come back!!! Next time with Nazo in tow.

Come home Nazo, please come home…

Kettle,

Oh, Next up is Toronto! BOOM!!

I was at the airport at DFW wearing my new super cool Cowboy hat. I was just about to pass through security on my way home from an AWESOME OKC workshop at Full Throttle Athletics in Frisco Texas when the security lady said to me “I need to see your eyes” in a pretty gruff way. I had forgotten I was wearing the hat.

As I passed her this itty bitty TSA guy looked at me and asked me where I was going, I actually had to think for a minute due to all of my traveling and when I said San Francisco he said with a tough guy neckroll (thumbs stuck in his belt) “I’m sorry”.

Is this guy fucking with me?

I looked at him and I said “well, I’m done with you food and your women so I guess it’s time” (no I didn’t but I wanted to) I actually said “right, we done here?” We were done.

Mess with Texas…check (really a half check).

The workshop was great. He facility at Full Throttle was amazing! I am so jealous! The Blifferts have every toy you can imagine. They even had several different styles of sport bells.

BJ picked Jason and I up at the airport and drove us to their house where they offered us our own rooms to stay in. We went out to dinner and got to meet our new friend Jim who was at both days of the workshop.

All of the people who were there were super cool and Jason and I had a blast working with them. On Saturday night Rev Bart drove all the way from Houston to eat with us and take the second day of the course. I think that him and Jim will be best friends forever .

The second day was really fun and I even started it off by drinking this crazy crank juice that BJ told me was like rocket fuel, or it might have been Tiger Blood I don’t know. Either way I was #Winning ™ for the first hour or so of the second day. When I finally got back to normal I realized that Jason was well on his way to sculpting these fine people into Kettlebell Rockstars!

After the workshop Jason and I said goodbye to everyone and went out to dinner with the Blifferts. We got to talk a bunch about our travels which is always fun! Next time we will bring the slide projector!

Monday we got our hats (and one for Nazo) and took some time to train and then take a few pics. It was a really fun day. It was a really fun trip. I hope we get invited back! Cough cough…

The only downer was that Nazo was not there. She was stuck in Japan and the earthquake had just hit. That is one of the reasons I haven’t written this blog sooner. I apologize BJ, I would have but every time I wanted to post it I just couldn’t. I don’t really know why.

I will say though if Full Throttle invites you to do a workshop in Frisco you should take them up on it! They are wonderful hosts and the attendees are bad ass!

Thank you all for coming to the workshop and thank you to BJ and Kori Bliffert for bringing us down and taking such good care of us. It was a real treat!

Kettle,

Oh, we’ll be in Costa mesa this weekend and there is always room for more.

Oh, what a wonderful thing Stage 5 is.

My training breaks down into five stages. Think of it like this:

Stage 1 Preseason

Stage 2 Regular Season

Stage 3 Post season

Stage 4 Championship game

Stage 5 Off Season

During these stages a lifter will use standard periodization to ramp up and peak at the competition. What I was thinking I would do is bitch a little about the different stages as I go through them. But before I talk about Stage 1 (which I am in now), and before I go downstairs to train, I just want to take a moment to tell you about my Stage 5.

It started as soon as my snatch set ended in Siberia. I hit my number, the one I had been training for all this time, and everything changed.

You see, by the time Jason and I were knees deep in Stage 4 we had given up all of the things that we loved. No booze, sugar, bread, nights out, and even women. The training was just too hard to think of indulging in these things. When we were not training we needed every moment of our rest days to recover. We were using only the best fuel we could afford. We needed sleep. I slept like a log every night for a month. There was nothing else I could do. So every time we saw something, a beer, a dessert, even a girl all we could say was staaaage fiiiive…

It was all we had to keep our sanity and honestly it was all we needed. That little light at the end, finally a little break in the clouds. We would look to our island.

So when that bell hit the ground it rung in STAGE 5!!!!! We were so happy! Rudnev had caught on to our little mantra earlier in the week and he chuckled about it. He teased us that we were gonna crack a beer right there on the platform as soon as the last set ended (Stone Cold Style).

Funny thing though, Dolby only had one set and I had two. When he finished I looked at him and told him he was in stage 5. He was still gasping and told me “not yet Chu-Hu” Fucking guy was waiting for me. That’s Dolby for ya…

After the competition Rudnev told us to be ready at “7-4-5 o’clock” for our celebration. He (and Igor) picked us up and brought us to a banya where we (and a few of Rudnev’s friends) enjoyed a feast. Homemade whiskey, homemade pancakes, and other unreal Russian delicacies were being shared with us along with the bbq’d sword stabbed steaks. They cooked for us. They shared their spirits and their stories.  These guys were Super high level. Cup of Russia winners, World Class Masters of Sport, world champions, and high military men, we drank with them. They honored us (THEY freaking honored US, insane, totally insane, totally backwards). It was incredible. It’s taken me all this time to write about it.

We feasted and then hit the Banya then out in the snow, then back in the banya, then back in the snow, in Siberia, in February. Almost all of the guys spoke some English but they all seemed to know how to say “Real Russia” in English.

That was the start of Stage 5. On the trip home we got to drink on the train, and at the airport, and on the plane…Real Russia! BOOM!!! Chu-Hi!!! I got to eat whatever the hell I wanted. There was no training for a week. Then just gpp for a week. We taught a great workshop in Texas (which I will write about tomorrow) and I ate more fried food than I thought I could. Then I got the email…

“Stage 5 is OVER!!!”

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…My beloved stage 5, I hardly knew you…

The length of Stage 5 is determined by your competition schedule. I am competing three times this year so my Stage 5 is short. Some lifters only train for one comp per year so their Stage 5 is longer. Some of them take the time to pickup pet projects. For example, Rudnev wanted to see how many dead hang pullups he could do. He trained for it and he did 41.

Or weird stuff like this

Stage 5 is super important. It gives you hope. It gives you a mental break and a physical break. It also gives you a chance to train in a different manner than standard GS training.  I am trying to be a sportsman but I can’t quit being a rockstar/ lothario /daredevil / king of all things bad for you cold turkey . That could kill me.

Sooooo Stage 5

When Jason and I got back to California, on the way home from the airport we needed a burger. We walked into the joint and I said to the girl behind the counter “I need the meanest thing you got here, twice, please help me, I think I love you” Dolby leaned in “what he said, hi, I’m Jason”.

Staaaaage Fiiiiive BOOM!!!

Oh, right, The Ritz…

We had stage five at the house of Ritz and—————edit for content——Chu-Hi————-cops——————huge———————————edit for content—————glitter———————with a—————edit for content————rubber ducky—————- looked like I beat up a clown.

It was epic.

Oh Stage 5, I feel like I should write you a poem…

Oh my sweet stage 5

Why is it so hard to get

Glitter off a rug?

See you in July Stage 5…

no, you hang up first…

ok, same time…

1…2…3…

Kettle,